???


Are you there for me?

Not you of course. I would never expect you to be there. You have only “known” me briefly.  I’m talking about the rest of you out there. The ones I see every day. Do I tell you everything? No, I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. Do I share my whole life with you? No, I don’t want you to feel sympathy for me. Do I share the pain and guilt with you? No, I just can’t.  So how would you really know me? I guess you can’t.

It’s hard for me to be a Sjogren’s Ambassador. My whole life is about being positive. I try my best even when I don’t feel it. I force myself to be happy when I’m in public for the sake of everyone else there or I just don’t go in public. Hence the, but you don’t look sick. I don’t want my children and family to know how bad off I am. I want to help but if I am faking it most of my life. Is that helping to get the word out about Sjogren’s? Am I denying it or am I being positive. Most of the time I feel I am being positive, but sometimes when so much comes down on me I’m  just not sure…

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